Your body is a temple

Hey brother,

I know Mondays can be tough.

After a weekend of distractions, a new week is here, and even work can feel stressful.

Because how can you work, when there is so much stuff going on in your brain?

So much so, that if you try to approach a girl, it will almost be impossible due to all the bullshit within yourself that you’re suppressing.

Then, when you try to go to sleep, the only way it by swiping on your phone until 2am, because that’s when the thoughts stop…

..this cannot continue.

I know it seems hopeless, but I’ve been dealing with the same shit, and now, I’m taking moments of gratitude before every meal because I’m happy.

It’s truly possible, and here is how:

A few weeks back, I was with my girlfriend

It’s evening time, and she is with the stoves cooking while I sit next to the dinner table which is also in the kitchen

we’re talking, but I’m not present

there is something on my mind that’s bothering me, and it’s manifesting as tension in the body.

The problem is that I’m pretending to be fine.

That is, until she asks me how I am

At first I feel resistance, because I’m a man and why would I tell her that I’m not feeling good?

I should be strong, and never be down, right?

Or?

We started our relationship on an intimate basis, and transparency has been a key factor throughout these months since we met.

I tell her that I’m feeling sad, and she asks me why.

I don’t remember what I said, and that’s not the point either. I felt sad, and had distracted myself the last few hours with work.

Now, when everything is quiet and we’re relaxing in the kitchen, the stuff come up.

So, what do I do?

I start talking, and she is listening.

Then after a while, I’m just feeling without talking, and she’s being present with me.

It’s the worst type of feeling. Every few seconds, thought come to my mind what want to distract me. Like making a move with her or talking about something fun, or even just thinking about something comforting. But I know this is an escape, so I sit with it.

An hour pass.

I start to feel better, and she goes to reheat the food.

Then, another wave comes, and I tell her I’m going to her room to process by myself.

I felt like crap, because here I am for an hour, being held space for, and then I tell her that I need space.

It’s feels like I’m rejecting her… but it was just in my mind.

In reality I needed to accept myself, and that’s what I did.

30 minutes pass, and I’m feeling much better.

We eat, talk and enjoy an intimate evening together.

You see, the problem is that if you want to feel safe within yourself you have to face the shit that’s making it feel unsafe. This means that YOU (no one else) has to go IN and go through all the unpleasantness.

It will be uncomfortable, there might be tears, laughter and even some episodes of rage. That is OK. The only way is through.

Because when you go through all of this, you come out on the other side.

And trust me, the other side is so worth all the discomfort.

Also, the discomfort gets more comfortable as you become more experienced with seeing that it doesn’t kill you.

And that’s when anxiety goes away, because once again you feel safe within yourself.

Step by step:
1. Dedicate an hour for this
2. Sit down and stare at the wall with the intention to deal with whatever comes up
3. Close your eyes or continue staring at the wall while relaxing into your body
4. Take deep breaths, relax, and see how relaxed you can get → The body will know what to do

I’ll see you tomorrow,

Edin