Today I woke up with social anxiety

Hey,

so yeah, this still happens, though over a decade of cold approach and inner work.

The thing is though, that I didn’t resist it because I knew what to do

and that it would only make the journey more adventurous.

First, I told myself that it’s okay to feel as I did and that we are not even bringing our phone out when going to the bakery (no pressure to ask for any numbers)

then, when leaving the door I decided that I would meet the world from a place of giving (Not seeking validation, but rather expressing myself and seeing if there is a connection)

As I’m turning the corner, the store is literally right around the corner, I don’t hug a tree because right now it feels too much - instead I just lightly touch it, as a way to go just a little bit outside my comfort zone.

Then, inside the bakery I feel the sensations in my body without judging them as good or bad (Allows me to be more present and not fall into old patterns)

This allows me to exchange a smile and an extended look with the cute girl behind the corner while making my order (now, I’m not into her, but by removing the pressure of getting a number I can appreciate her as she is)

Then, outside the bakery there is a dog which I feel is a bit low in his mood so I pet him with love and this affirms that I’m out to give.

Going back, there is a girl by her herself on her phone also looking a bit lonely so I want to make her day and ask her a few easy questions in Spanish - she lights up! (Again, out there to give)

Now, I’m back home to make breakfast, and as I’m going out later today and tonight, the world now feels safer and I’m more relaxed about my intention today of meeting an attractive girl for sex.

In case you didn’t catch it, the thing I did was to babystep it and in this way slowly expand my comfort zone. 

We’ll see how it goes later, but now it’s time for food!

Let’s make this Saturday into a good one,

Edin