Did you see that girl?

Hello my man,

today is a beautiful day, and I’m listening to Rock & Roll (my new favorite genre).

As I look out the window, people are walking by and sometimes there is a cute girl that makes my heart skip a beat.

You know the feel yeah?

After the initial desire, the mind usually kicks in.

In the past, I would’ve thought something like “You can never go up to her”.

so I didn’t.

Since then I’ve worked on silencing this inner critic and integrating the Inner Wingman instead.

Now my mind says something like “She’s cute, do you wanna speak with her?”.

so when I want to, I get up from my seat and talk with her.

Here’s how you can do the same:

1) Acknowledge the inner critic
The voice in your mind is based on old experiences. Likely from a time where you were more dependent on others approval, like in your childhood. As you recognize this, you start to understand that it’s just a voice from the past, nothing else.

2) Journal and Reflection
Understanding why the voice is where is your next step. What happened in the past that cause you to think this way? Who said this to you? What type of events trigger this thought?

3) Challenge the limiting thought
If the thought is “It’s not the right time”, then figure out why. Is it because you are in the middle of a meeting? Well, that’s valid, but would it be OK if you excused yourself for 2 minutes to use the bathroom? And then quickly approached her. Probably you would return to the meeting with more energy. Win-win

4) Build compassion
Going up to a stranger, especially an attractive girl can feel scary. A lot of thing can go wrong, and the part of yourself that feels this fear doesn’t need anything but compassion. If you can make this part of yourself feel safe, then you will start to receive backing instead of resistance.

5) Discover your Authentic Confidence
By making sure your inner parts are OK with the action, although scary, you’ll start to build trust in yourself. Not because you can get her into bed, but because you’re able to act on your desires. This is empowering and after a while you’ll feel confident. Not the surface level one, but the authentic confidence.

These steps takes more time initially, but after practicing, especially if you have a coach or a mentor to help you become aware of the limiting beliefs and challenge them - it will happen naturally.

That’s when your inner critic is transformed into your Internal Wingman.

Which is also when meeting girls becomes fun and easy.

I’ll see you tomorrow,

Edin