Can I be myself

Hey man,

You have a conversation with her, and though she is attractive, you don’t show it to her.

Maybe it’s because you’ve been friends for a while, or colleagues

Either way, there is this wall between you and her so that you don’t feel connected.

Which you are tired of!

I get it, these situations are draining over time and it was not until I experienced being real with a girl that I really started to enjoy being with her.

And it seems like she enjoys being with me more as well.

Example, this weekend I was on a date.

We’ve seen each other a couple of times and it’s great. We have fun together.

I wanted to tell her that I’m not looking for anything serious right now, but it felt too early to do so.

I believed that she would think I’m a loser for starting this type of conversation so early in the dating.

Like she would be thinking “Wtf, he’s so needy”

But after a chat with a female friend earlier that day, I decided to say it.

It was not easy, but I did, and turns out she’s on the same page.

The air cleared between us and I felt more connected than before.

Like a new level of trust and understanding opened.

This came because I decided to go first and open up about it, and she was happy I did because it's uncomfortable to do so.

That’s real masculinity btw, going first, risking rejection and pain for the potential of breaking through.

And I did - we had an amazing evening…

Your mind will expand when you take action, because you will either learn or you will have an amazing experience (or both!).

So in order to feel a connection, you need to be the person who is stepping up and being safe to connect with.

That involves a risk, and that’s why I find it crucial to create a sense of safety within yourself that you can always fall back on.

So no matter what happens, you like yourself.

If not, it’s so easy to fall into the old pattern of neediness and doing whatever just to get her.

That’s where no connection is ever made because you go out of your integrity, say and do stuff you don’t really mean.

While holding back your real desire.

So we need to create the sense of approval from within.

This takes practice, and that’s why I host live dating bootcamps.

We practice creating this feeling of safety within yourself, inviting girls to connect and give you proof that you can indeed be yourself and still be liked.

I’m hosting the next one on the last weekend of September, in currently sunny Barcelona.

There are 4 spots left, and if you want in or just want the details, reply “ready” and I’ll send it to you.

Take care and stay growing,

Edin